The Red Continent

WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! Africa, the Dark Continent, is turning into a Red Continent. This is not due to American Express RED or any of the other RED initiatives. This is not some 'Bangalore to Bengaluru' type transformation, either. Its not because of global warming causing red hot temperatures, either. If you want to argue with me that Red is a dark color too, then trust me - its going to get a few shades lighter over time. I am no Nostradamus, but if you flip Africa in the Atlas 50 years from now, this is what you are going to see
Yes, people. China is taking over Africa! After making everything from needles to dining tables on the Wal-mart retail aisles, China now wants to make continents! China is massively expanding business with Africa and Chinese colonialism is just around the corner. Didnt British colonialism in India start with trade? And, then Mumbai became Bombay, Bengaluru became Bangalore, etc.

Watch out people! The days of Swahi Lee being a person & a language are not very far away. Cape Town will be renamed to China Town. Nairobi will be Nailobi, Darfur will be Dalfool, Serengeti to Selengeti - you get the idea but the biggest change of them all - Africa to AFLICA!! There will be no need for Fairtrade coffee any more as Aflicans would have given up coffee for tea and coffee will be only slightly more important than human waste in the average Aflican's mind. Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon moves will be inherent to all NBA players making terms such as Air Jordan move to fine print of basketball history. Of course you cannot avoid the arrival of Wei Obasanjo, Dwayne Hsing, Shaquille Chui, etc. Not all Hsings and Chuis on business trips will actually know they sprouted Dwaynes and Shaquilles. So, more and more Chinese will die of AIDS and actually serve as a population control mechanism. Human rights will be left behind. The world will be what the Chinese want it to be.

Brace yourself for the new Karliyug! Bye now, its time for my Mandarin classes ...